Mad Welshie
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IrishmanAn Irishman goes to the local pub to celebrate St. Patrick's Day, like he does every day, and gets wasted out of his mind. He stumbles outside when the bartender tells him that he's had enough, but he can barely walk. So he leans up against a tree, where he passes out.
A few minutes later, a couple of fine lassies go walking by. One says to the other one, "Do you think they wear anything under those kilts?" She admits that she doesn't know. So they go to check it out.
She lifts up the kilt and sees him in all his glory. As they replace the kilt and get ready to walk away, an idea enters one of their heads. "Give me your blue hair ribbon," she says. Reluctantly, she hands it over. She goes back over to the Irishman, lifts up the kilt, and ties the ribbon to him. They walk away laughing.
A few hours later, the drunk gets up to take a piss. He stands up, walks over to the bushes, hikes up his kilt, looks down and sees the blue ribbon. He thinks for a minute and says, "To be perfectly honest, I don't know how you got away, and I don't know what you did, and I don't know who you did it to, but I'm sure glad to see that you got first prize!"
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